You've got to know when to hold 'em

There are several decisions that are challenging me to decide when its the right time to lay my cards on the table. Because everything I'm doing now is unchartered territory for me, I'm much more reticent than I usually am about showing my cards too early. One of the big decisions is how much money and effort I want to put into preparing for my key customer segment's annual conference. Since I started two weeks ago, I've actually closed more projects than I had originally projected (good news). But they are all with one client (mediocre news). I'm a firm believer in spreading my eggs around multiple baskets, so the conference would be a great opportunity to connect with other prospective clients. It would also push me to finish several demos and other little marketing plans I have in order to showcase them to the widest possible number of prospects. And where my ego kicks in, I really just want to be there showing cool stuff and squelching any possible questions of what happened to me.

BUT, my number one priority is doing a fantastic job with the projects that we have on deck. And we'd probably make a lot more progress talking to my old contacts in one-on-one conversations where I can really highlight our demos and capabilities. Plus, the cost of going to the conference is probably more than I want to spend right now, and there's no sense of doing it half way--only one chance to make a first impression.

So I'm torn: relax a little and focus on the hand I have, or go all in for the big debut. I guess I'm on my own on this one, because as Kenny tells us, the Gambler, he broke even. I'm not looking to break even. I'm looking to win.

There are more people out there like me

Yesterday we met with another company to see their design and animation capabilities, to see if we could work with them on upcoming demos and projects. I got a lot more out of the meeting, though--we met some guys who are kind of like us, but farther along in this entrepreneurial road. They started their company a few years ago, and during our meeting with them yesterday, we got a glimpse into their "start up story"--some of the why and how they left the corporate machine to start their own gig.

It was a good day to have that meeting and hear those stories--yesterday morning I met with the sharkweasel (my lawyer) and realized there's a whole list of things that I need to do that I haven't done yet. (like insurance...evidently I need that...) I realized that I'm only two weeks old and although I started out feeling like I was really smart and could do this, every day I've started to feel more and more like an idiot. Not because what I know is wrong, just because there's so much I don't know. And so much that I don't know that I don't know.

I'm looking forward to meeting and making friends with other new entrepreneurs. They make me feel just a little bit smarter. And that there's hope. Because I'm only two weeks old...

Inspiration!

I was poking around some blogs a couple days ago, and ran across The Last Lecture of Carnegie Mellon University professory Randy Pausch. At an hour and 16 minutes long, its feature film length, but it was the best 76 minutes I've spent in a long time. Two major reasons I recommend you take the time to watch this:

1. This guy had an amazing opportunity to define his legacy in a way that very few people do. His awareness, reflection, and insight into his achievements is remarkable, and in and of itself, its enough to inspire people to work to achieve their dreams.
2. He taught people to design virtual worlds! He understands and executed the crazy balance of entertainment, technology, and education. He helped develop a whole curriculum to make these connections for academia, corporations, and middle school students. He had the job I've always wanted.

So skip watching reality tv for a night, and watch this video on the reality of a guy who helped push virtual reality. Then make a list of your childhood dreams and figure out how you're going to achieve them.

Turf war of words

Yesterday I got into a turf war with another vendor over their audio scripting. It was funny for several reasons. But let me set the scene...

My client copies me on an email regarding an audio script that another vendor wrote; since we were going to be incorporating the video they were producing in our e-learning module, he wanted me to review it. So I reviewed it as I would any script that one of my writers would send to me. I changed it from passive to active voice, and I changed the "we" point of view narration to "you" because of the personalization adult learning principle (people remember more if content is personalized to them and their direct experience).

I knew before I sent it that the other vendor was going to be upset about my edits. There's nothing that riles a person up more than another vendor coming in and correcting something you've done in front of your client. So when I sent my comments, I did the whole "hey, this is just my opinion, I put all my comments in tracked changes, you and client can totally ignore if you see fit," blah, blah, blah.

No sooner do I send my edits than the other vendor sends an email back to our client, explaining why my comments should be ignored. I know this because I was on the phone with the client and he was reading me the email and I was again explaining why I made the edits and he could totally ignore me without my being offended. So he went through the pros-cons cycle: he DID ask my opinion and expertise in the first place, and I DID have rationale based on learning research to back up my changes, and ultimately I'm getting paid for providing them with my expertise in learning. So in the end they kept my changes (of course, while I was on the phone there was also an informal survey on the client-side of what everyone in the room thought, but I also won that by a narrow margin).

Score one for research, grammar, and a little tenacity. And on National Grammar Day, no less...

Splitting the pie

You're starting a business, but you're not alone...how do you figure out how much of the business people deserve from the get go, before you have any history to pull from? I found this handy-dandy tool, which, although not perfect and definitely subjective, gives you some criteria to help come up with a number. Better than the SWAG or finger to the wind method...

Everybody's working for (and on) the weekend

It used to be that Friday was the best day of the week. Sometimes it still is, but in recent years, and especially now that I'm trying to get this company up and running, the weekends are just two more working days. Working days where I'm also taking care of the kids, trying to have an occasional adult conversation with my husband that's not about work or the kids, and even more rarely these days trying to catch up with my friends and extended family. By the end of the day on Friday, I'm dreading the weekend and everything I've got to try to squeeze in to get ready for the next week.

One of the things I want to try to preserve in this first year of starting this company is my personal time, at least as much as possible. My work is my hobby, its what I love to do, and I have a hard time separating work from personal time simply for that reason...its not really that much like work to me. Ok, it is work, and I know that, and its stressful and never-ending, but I do love it. Which is why checking email, reviewing projects, etc., just doesn't seem like a big deal to do over the weekend. I've fallen into the trap of depending on weekend hours to play catch up.

But I remember what it was like to just simply have my weekends to do the non-work things that I love. So, I'm making a pledge to take back my weekends to do those things, which I never get to during the work week.

Just as soon as I finish this post...

Breaking up is hard to do

When you leave your old job to start a new one, or in my case to try to start a new one, I've found that people generally have three reactions:

1. Indifference: Typically a general "good for you" because your leaving either doesn't effect them or because maybe they secretly wanted you to leave anyway
2. Where are you going and can I go there too?: Its amazing who comes out of the woodwork on this side (and sometimes who doesn't). In some cases its great to get this reaction, especially out of the people you'd love to keep working with. In other cases, this can be tough, either because you can't immediately see how this person fits into your new gig, or because you were secretly glad you were leaving this person behind
3. How dare you!: This is the tough one. This is the one that leads to ugly behavior on the part of your ex-coworkers

So let's talk about the "How dare you!" people. They could be benign, cut any personal relationship they have with you and rally the remaining troops to move forward and succeed, hopefully better than when you were working with them. I understand (to some extent) hurt feelings when someone leaves, and this seems to me to be the high road that people who have this reaction can take.

But then there are the people who want to try to hurt you back. For whatever reason, people get so overprotective of their current positions, or see an opportunity to raise their value in the company, that they turn to the bully mentality of trying to make themselves look good by cutting the person who is leaving down. I'm not talking about the people you work with that do this all of the time, you'd expect this reaction from them. I'm talking about the people who you respected while you worked together, maybe even were friends with, that not only cut you off once you announce you're leaving, but look for ways to get back at you (threats of lawsuits, etc.).

I've heard that since I've left, co-workers have been reading through my old emails looking for "wrongdoing" or evidence of some sort. I'm sorry to say they'll be disappointed--I wish nothing but success for them and did nothing while I was working there to put the future success of the company at risk. I do feel a little sad that this is what they've resorted to--I hope that someday, when one of the key leaders in my company leaves, and I'm feeling hurt or angry or suspicious, that I'll remember this and take the high road. Better yet, I hope I just wish them well, figure out how to up my game, and look forward to competing with them.