I've been in a whirlwind of "stuff" that has been keeping me so extraordinarily busy that I've been thinking a lot about how to get to a better, more peaceful place. Then it struck me...I'm not really a "peaceful" kinda girl.
I've been considering happiness lately; more specifically, what makes me happy. People aspire to be "content" or "satisfied." To me? That reads: boring. My God...I can't even imagine what it must be like to feel those emotions, let alone WANT to feel them. The minute I feel content, I'm already thinking "what's next?"
I realize that leads me to live this crazy, complicated life. I realize it opens me up to be over-extended, over-scheduled, and lately....over-tired. It creates this dynamic where I never feel like I'm caught up, where I can never quite reach the finish line. That expression "I'll sleep when I'm dead"? I don't think I was supposed to take it so literally.
The truth is...this crazy life IS my contentment. It IS my happiness. It's messy and complicated and stressful but passionate and surprising and joyful and interesting. I may not be satisfied, but I sure am having fun.
And yes, I was just dancing in my living room to Ricky Martin. You should too.